Did I Ruin My Chances With Him?

video
play-sharp-fill

How easy is it when a relationship feels like it’s crumbling, or has ended, that we go upstairs deep into our heads thinking about all the things we could have done differently?

This of course feels extremely disempowering because it is an avoidance and resistance around facing what IS. 

When we’re avoiding dealing with what is, we tend to make things worse and create even more scenarios to ruminate on. 

Instead of thinking of all the mistakes we’ve made, I invite you to meet yourself where you are right now and begin making steady and impactful changes rooted in authenticity. 

I firmly believe when we practice the feminine energy tools to get an outcome, it is unsustainable and the lesson will present again in a different way. I’ve seen this over and over again. 

Feminine energy must be practiced from the heart and for ourselves to have a deeply nourishing and healing impact within ourselves and our relationships. 

Below I will share three things you can do to start to improve your chances with him whether you’re still together or if the relationship has ended. 

  1. Live In Truth

For those of you that know me or have worked with me, you know I believe telling the truth is the most powerful place to start. 

Why? 

Because there is a natural magnetism that occurs in truth. 

We attract who’s meant for us and release those that aren’t. 

If we’re too busy upstairs in our heads trying to control one’s perception of us, we block their ability to truly SEE us for who we really are. 

Start owning who you are versus trying to figure out who another wants you to be. 

This is the most liberating and empowering feeling I can think of. 

Start taking baby steps to own fully who you are by staying in your lane and focusing on your own feelings and internal experience. 

2. Stop Gossiping About Him

As you probably already know, gossip is incredibly toxic. 

Whether it’s about him or someone else, gossip is a way in which we seek to be in control, rationalize our behavior, or put ourselves above another. 

I have made it a practice in my life to not partake in any gossip. 

My husband knows and more importantly feels this. 

He knows that if I have an issue, I’ll talk to him directly versus speak negatively about him to others. 

This matters so much on an energetic level because a man can feel it whether consciously or subconsciously. 

The amount of trust our partner has for us correlates with the actions and behaviors we participate in when they’re not around too. 

3. Making Sure Your Emotions And Words Match

This goes along with living in truth. 

This can get fuzzy for many though because we want to be perceived as nice and laid back! 

We operate under what we think we should do versus honoring what we’re actually feeling inside. 

In practice this means to slow down, check in, invite in present moment awareness, and then take the step. 

So often this is done in the opposite manner!

Being intentional in making sure what’s coming out of our mouth’s matches what we’re feeling inside is what creates emotional safety in our relationships. 

All of us can deal with the truth, we can’t deal with one who is putting on an act though because what we’re hearing and feeling from them are two different things. 

Practice this in a respectful and clean way, and I am confident you will see others feel safer around you. 

If you’re in a situation where you don’t get to practice this directly with him because the relationship has ended, be sure to practice anywhere you can as men can truly feel when we are self honoring and holding space for ourselves.

I’ve been amazed over the years around the curiosity this evokes in the masculine as we take steps to claim ourselves. 

Book an Introductory Call with me to discuss your situation!

Love,

Jen

Posted in

Leave a Comment