As women we’ve been taught that the secret to a man’s heart is connected to how attracted he is to us.
While attraction is important, it’s not what holds the lasting key to the deep love and devotion we desire from a man.
What connects a man to us forever, and inspires him to devote himself selflessly to a woman is feeling respected and understood by her. He feels she gets him on a whole other level.
This is not about trying to make something happen. So often I see women working to prove to a man how much she gets him or understands him, that she completely turns him off.
The vibe feels desperate and inauthentic.
She is using strategy and he feels this.
Men fall in love because of the way they feel when they’re around us.
There is nothing more attractive to a man than a woman they feel emotionally safe with.
A woman where they feel totally free to be themselves, let their guard down, and share who they are. She feels like a soft place to land after being out in the world dealing with conflict, competition, putting up a front, etc.
He can come home and let all that go. He feels completely at ease when he’s with her.
This is how we inspire devotion and having his heart…forever.
If you get older, get sick, gain some weight, fall off track…it doesn’t matter.
You’ve connected to a deeper part of him, and so his loyalty and love is yours. It’s unwavering.
Three Ways To Inspire Devotion
1. Get Back To Getting To Know You
In order to inspire lasting love and devotion, we have to be committed to being ourselves… unapologetically.
This means allowing ourselves to feel vulnerable and exposed.
If we don’t feel safe being ourselves and expressing who we are, he won’t either.
I remember in my own marriage, I used to wear a mask and hide when I was feeling hurt, angry, or sad. For many years, I didn’t even realize that I was covering up my emotions. I was protecting myself and didn’t even know that this was what I was doing!
Once I became aware of it, I slowly started to peel off all the layers.
For me that meant when something that was said that hurt, I stopped covering it up my saying something sarcastic or witty.
I would sit there for a minute or so with it and figure out what was going on inside, and express it without putting it on him or anyone else.
This demonstrated that I was a woman that could handle difficult emotions. It made him feel safe to share more of what was going on inside of him too.
2. Stop “Selling Yourself”
So often we think that we can inspire love and devotion by having a fabulous relationship “resume.”
We’ll unknowingly be working for his love.
We’ll talk about our family, our career, our education, or travels in a way where we thing that he’ll be impressed and inspired to connect to us.
He may appreciate this aspect of you, but it will never lead to having his heart. This is because these are aspects of you and your life experience, but it’s not who you are at your core.
Exposing the parts we’re not so proud of is critical in connecting to man and allowing him to know who we are for real, not just the resume version.
3. Be In The Moment With Him
How often do we really give ourselves permission to just be and not have something we need to worry about?
When we’re with a man, we can be so focused on what’s next, that we completely miss out on the opportunity to connect with him in the moment.
Don’t underestimate the power of truly being in the moment with a man.
This is where good deposits are made, and what he remembers when thinking of you and what he wants.
When we’re not worried about anything and we’re simply being and enjoying, this inspires him to move closer and connect in such a powerful way.
He’s in his head all day, so when you invite him energetically to be in the moment and get out of it for a while, you are creating a deep lasting impression on him.
This must be authentic. I have seen how this hooks a man’s heart to a woman in such a beautiful way.
There is nothing I am more passionate about than being of service to women in creating the life and love they deeply desire. This is not unattainable and it can happen for you, no matter how far away it may seem in the moment.
If you’re struggling in your relationship, or dealing with the pain of a recent break up, my new Get Your Ex Back Program will help you quickly.
The program includes one week of email coaching to address your specific needs.
I am so confident that I can help you have the relationship you have always wanted.
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